Not quite but almost

Picture downloaded from gOOgle
Photo belongs to rightful owner. 

As she started her unending muttering of her self-perception of greatness, I have been left of no choice but to yield and emerge as the inferior one. Struggling to stay alert and interested was the challenge I had to triumph over. I was never like this before, or maybe secretly I was. But gradually, her insufferable self-importance has out balanced the years that I considered her as a companion to walk beside with in the curves of life. Envy? Not quite but almost. I have always known that I am not really the person people assumed me to be but my surfacing new attributes somehow frightens and disgusts me. 

JUST FOR ONCE

JUST FOR ONCE:
Why cant I just excel? (Always flunking)
Why cant I just be strong? ( Depression prone)
Why cant I be that girl? (AA related, he got his name, I hate her!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Don’t you think Its kind of unfair?, Maybe that’s just the story of my life, my deprived life. I always say this in my down moments and I feel guilty. Maybe I am just being selfish, surely I cant have everything.